Monday, September 21, 2009

Super Hero Tournament Round 1 Results

Round 1

A lot of these were kind of no brainer fights so I won't get too detailed with those. Here are the results of the first round of the super hero tournament.

Black Bolt defeats Emma Frost by talking.

Unfortunately, Dazzler was able to defeat Nick Fury based on the fact that she is a mutant and he is just a dude.

She Hulk uses her strength and stomps the shit out of Spider Woman.

Captain America tops Bishop because he's the man.

Gambit is able to defeat Night Thrasher because he can make things explode.

Hulk beat Iron Fist because the Hulk is a mutated killing machine and Iron Fist is a half assed ninja. This was in spite of Rob's insistence that Iron Fist could win because he once pulled the heart out of a dragon.

Bucky defeats Chase Stein because he has more going for him than some tricked up gloves.

Ghost Rider over Power Man because Power Man is a lame ass character.

In the first really interesting matchup on the board, Punisher falls in defeat to War Machine. I predict War Machine will get a big head and lose in the second round due to a contract dispute.

Xavier destroys Jubilee, duh!

Iceman encases Namor in a block of ice and that pretty much ended that fight.

Dr. Strange overcomes being distract by Ms. Marvel's incredibly hot ass long enough to send to another dimension.

Nico Minoru casts a spell from her staff that turns the Thing into a mud puddle. Game over.

Wolverine slices up Captain Britian.

Iron Man makes quick work of Angel.

Beast defeats Cloak & Dagger thanks to his powers not sucking.

Moon Knight makes quick work of Kitty Pryde.

Cable easily defeats Ant Man.

Shitty luck Spidey, your senses didn't do a damn thing for you against Thor.

Molly Hayes uses her awesome super strength to beat Rogue half to death.

Now this next fight seemed like a no brainer in Deadpool's favor but the more we thought about the more we realized that the Invisible Woman could just create a force ball surrounding Deadpool and then walk away. Chalk up a win for Sue Richards.

X-23 cuts ribbons through Nova.

Skaar uses his strength advantage to pummel Black Widow into a pulp.

Scarlet Witch pulls the old No More Mutants trick out of her bag to send Colossus packing.

Black Panther tops Hawkeye.

Jean Grey beats Luke Cage proving that brains usually do trump brawn.

In another hotly debated matchup, we decided that Nightcrawler would be able to hit-phase-hit faster than Daredevil could respond.

Hercules beats Mr. Fantastic proving that sometimes brawn does trump brains.

Human Torch sends Black Knight riding off into the sunset.

Wasp defeats Cyclops because she is too small for him to target accurately.Also, Scott Summers is kind of a bitch.

And despite my defense that he is a duck and the perfect matchup for him, it was decided that Storm could defeat Howard the Duck without really trying very hard.

So here are the matchups for round 2.

Black Bolt V. Dazzler
She Hulk v. Captain America
Gambit v. Hulk
Bucky v. Ghost Rider
War Machine v. Xavier
Iceman v. Dr. Strange
Nico v. Penance
Wolverine v. Iron Man
Beast v. Moon Knight
Cable v. Thor
Molly Hayes v. Invisible Woman
X-23 v. Skaar
Scarlet Witch v. Black Panther
Jean Grey v. Night Crawler
Hercules v. Human Torch
Wasp v. Storm

So what do you think will happen? Please feel free to comment and let us know.

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